Crap...

[2Evil4U]

My worst fear has been realized.



I am a BMW-Riding elitist.



This morning coming down 19 through Zachary I hit the red light at 64. I saw an M109R turn left from 64 onto 19 south.

Let me rephrase that. I HEARD an M109R turn left from 64 onto 19 South.

He disappeared into the distance and I caught then next light red as well so I didn't think anything of it. I started my normal ride down the section of divided four lane and ended up catching him about an eighth mile before Cox Cable. Being in the left lane, I think OK, I'll cruise on past, wave and carry on.

Not to be.

When I got about 50' from him he opened the thing up and started to pace me. I could no longer hear the meliforous twangs & plinks of XM bluegrass wafting around in my helmet over the racket.

Great, I thought, he wants to be friends. Well, I don't need a friend at 0545 in Baker, LA.

So I carried a little more speed than normal into the 45mph zone and got in front after passing a compact car. Though I felt bad when I dropped in front as he crowded me into the car. I hoped that was going to be the end of it.

Again, not to be.

We got caught at the next light and he pulled in front as I was slowing down and stopped beside me in the next lane. I was turning up the Deliverance Soundtrack to battle the hysterical braaaapping that was being emitted by the UJM and looked over and he waved. I waved back, not altogether amused. At least he had a long sleeved shirt on with the non-DOT beenie.

The light turned green and away he blatted. (Christ, unmuffled Metric Cruisers sound terrible. I'd rather be behind ANY of the motards in our group or a pack of Hells Angels.)

I kept back several cars as I figured I wasn't going to lose him on 19, and I don't need another ticket.

When we got to the camera'd intersection before the 110, I ended up behind him. Since the lights at the 19/110 intersection blink yellow until 0600, I had my chance.

Using my vast intellect and all my analytical skills, I deduced that he would take the corner from 19 to the 110 ramp from the left lane at about 5mph.

Yep.

I carried about 40 mph until he started braking, and hung in the right lane in second gear, dropped it into the corner, arcing gracefully around him, scraping my toe on the ground all while waving goodbye.

I cranked it up through the gears to about a buck on the ramp and then settled back down into my normal cruise to work. I figured he'd come blasting back up in Ricer-Fly-By mode once he got through the corners, but I never saw him again.

My name is Aaron, and I'm a BMW-Riding Elitist.

[BradyM]

The first step is admitting you have a problem! You're on your way to recovery. Next you have to believe you can over come this. We're all here for you.

[Shaq Diesel]

ROFL

At least you waved at him. and it could of been worse, you could of been sipping a Starbucks while passing him!

[mattc]

What a snob...:rotfl:

[derf]

I am sorry you had to be exposed to that trash on the public roads.
If you carry that big S&W in a shoulder holster (will it fit in one?) you probably won't have any more riff-raff harassing you, except maybe the badge wearing kind.

[scootertrash]

I was waiting for "He sure had a purdy mouf!" Funny story, I needed a good laugh this morning.

[Ritten]

Well said my friend. Your recollection of this morning's events was greatly entertaining. However, I must point out that your entitlement as a "BMW-riding Elitist" will only be complete when your story includes careful and strategically placed clues as to how much your bike costs, the superiority of your gear, and any future plans for farkles that will make the ride easier. However......you're WELL on your way. :D

[opus68]

How could you consider yourself elitist? I mean, just because every other bike on the road is inferior to a BMW doesn't make YOU elitist. You don't build the bikes, do you? No, you just happened to pick a brand that's better than everything else.

[mattc]

How could you consider yourself elitist? I mean, just because every other bike on the road is inferior to a BMW doesn't make YOU elitist. You don't build the bikes, do you? No, you just happened to pick a brand that's better than everything else.

Inferior??

I never had to change ANY bearings on my 50,000 mile Suzuki...





































:wall:

[LiteHeaded]

I am a BMW-Riding elitist.





I waved at a BMW rider one time before.

[opus68]

Inferior??

I never had to change ANY bearings on my 50,000 mile Suzuki...

:wall:
Figured I might stir up some people here.:shady:

[LAYNFRM]

freakin bimmer owners!!!!!


what's wrong with being behind a motard? that's where most people end up anyways... everyone will want to be ahead of me in a couple weeks due to the great smell of premix oil in the air. well, everyone but phil (chopt) that is, cause he's like me, and loves it, lol

[BradyM]

freakin bimmer owners!!!!!


the great smell of premix oil in the air. well, everyone but phil (chopt) that is, cause he's like me, and loves it, lol

:poop:

I thought I was weird for liking that smell. Granted I like that smell coming off a 2 stroke outboard motor early in the morning and the refreshing sound of a beer can being opened as the sun rises accompanying the smell just before a full day of fishing, but still the same smell.

[2Evil4U]

Cue David Allen Coe:

So I sent this to my friend Ted and told him that I had penned the perfect Elitist BMW Rider Forum Post.

He read it and replied that I had NOT written the perfect Elitist BMW Rider Forum Post because I had said nothing about the cost of my bike, its superiority to all others, the superiority of my gear and my superiority for wearing it, the quality of the bike's accessories and my future plans to improve the bike to elevate its status above the pinnacle upon which it currently rests.

So I sat down and thought for awhile and wrote another few paragraphs and hopefully now, I've written the perfect Elitist BMW Rider Forum post.

So, while gliding effortlessly down 110 after the incident with the metric cruiser-riding ruffian, not even bothering to avoid the uneven road surfaces as the wonderous teutonic suspension designs that are Telelever and Paralever absorbed every wanton shock and shimmy such that had I been able to consume a Starbucks Latte through my full-faced, Snell and SFI Spec integrated cranial protection device, I would have been able to do so with nary a care wasted on the possibility of spillage, I wondered to myself, how can people look at themselves in the mirror each morning when they are relegated to commuting on machines that are built to such a standard that they can be sold for half or less of the $20+ thousand dollars I have invested in my German thoroughbred?

And a bit further down the road, I began wondering as I was adjusting the volume on my cellular phone to be a bit more audible, deciding where I will be mounting the tire pressure monitoring system computer, and slowing for an approaching radar trap as indicated by my integrated Valentine One Radar & Laser Detector, don't these poor fools realize that they can never achieve true enjoyment or understanding of the simple freedom that comes from riding a motorcycle, until they do it on a BMW?

[cbbr]

:1stplace::D

[Ritten]

So, while gliding effortlessly down 110 after the incident with the metric cruiser-riding ruffian, not even bothering to avoid the uneven road surfaces as the wonderous teutonic suspension designs that are Telelever and Paralever absorbed every wanton shock and shimmy such that had I been able to consume a Starbucks Latte through my full-faced, Snell and SFI Spec integrated cranial protection device, I would have been able to do so with nary a care wasted on the possibility of spillage, I wondered to myself, how can people look at themselves in the mirror each morning when they are relegated to commuting on machines that are built to such a standard that they can be sold for half or less of the $20+ thousand dollars I have invested in my German thoroughbred?

And a bit further down the road, I began wondering as I was adjusting the volume on my cellular phone to be a bit more audible, deciding where I will be mounting the tire pressure monitoring system computer, and slowing for an approaching radar trap as indicated by my integrated Valentine One Radar & Laser Detector, don't these poor fools realize that they can never achieve true enjoyment or understanding of the simple freedom that comes from riding a motorcycle, until they do it on a BMW?



EPIC WIN!!!!!! :1stplace::1stplace::respect::respect:

[Dirty_Sanchez]

Hey Evil- When are you going to give back those vocabulary tapes I loaned you awhile back?

Dirty

[BradyM]

Scratch my earlier post. I was gravely mistaken! You weren't admitting you have a problem, you were proudly declaring the fact as a milestone in your life. Some soft of German engineering induced nirvana! You have arrived my friend! Cue the Bud Light "Real Men of Genius" music. Here's to you Mr. BMW riding, latte sipping, feel bad for anyone who doesn't understand how superior you are Elitist! Without you the rest of us mere mortal riders would feel adequate, and not sit for countless hours in the corner gazing at our belly buttons contemplating why it is that ALL guys who ride BMW's have such big tally wackers, and look good and are so strong! So here's to you Mr. BMW riding, latte sipping, feel bad for anyone who doesn't understand how superior you are Elitist, cause you know you are the S**T!

[cooney]

This forum is so much more entertaining than anything on the tube!

[Redbird]

I thought I was weird for liking that smell.
The smell is cool, but the sound of a two stroke is were it's at!


Hey Evil- When are you going to give back those vocabulary tapes I loaned you awhile back?
That's it? I figured he was making the best of that "Word-a-Day" calender!

And I had an experience with a BMW rider last Sunday. We were at the Capitol for the Rally when a BMW tourer rolled in. It was the guy on the blue one (y'all know all the other BMW riders right?). I think it was the KIZOOLT (sp?). I'm not sure what that means, but then I don't speak Swedenese either.
Anyway... he stops the bike, pushes a button, and I shit you not... the bike put itself on it's centerstand! I asked him which button activated the Crappuccino machine, but he didn't seem near as amused with me as I was with him.:Tazer1:

[2Evil4U]

Yep, electric centerstand.

According to the Las Vegas BMW Service Manager, the LT in that designation stands for Light Truck.

[Ritten]

....but he didn't seem near as amused with me as I was with him.:Tazer1:


You should have showed him what you were riding. I bet he'd have chuckled pretty good at that one!

[thedrizel]

Not everyone likes BMW (http://www.livevideo.com/video/Zedith/B968174CB3FB46A6B674BAD08FCFFBB6/hitler-and-his-new-gs.aspx)
(http://www.livevideo.com/video/Zedith/B968174CB3FB46A6B674BAD08FCFFBB6/hitler-and-his-new-gs.aspx)

[BradyM]

Not everyone likes BMW (http://www.livevideo.com/video/Zedith/B968174CB3FB46A6B674BAD08FCFFBB6/hitler-and-his-new-gs.aspx)
(http://www.livevideo.com/video/Zedith/B968174CB3FB46A6B674BAD08FCFFBB6/hitler-and-his-new-gs.aspx)

No matter how many times I see it it's funny.

[Klantz]

No matter how many times I see it it's funny.

yup :1stplace:

[ka5ysy]

... don't these poor fools realize that they can never achieve true enjoyment or understanding of the simple freedom that comes from riding a motorcycle, until they do it on a BMW?



Please tell us what you are drinking .... I want some of that too :respect:


Oh.... Wait a minute........... I have a BMW too...


It must be the quiet purr of the engine, the superior suspension system, and the CAN-Bus, ABS, ASC, ESA, ATGATT etc. lulling us into a higher state of existence and consciousness....:1stplace:










NEVER MIND !Group Hug









Hi..... my name is Doug and I am a Beemerhaulic.:eek:






One question though..... I can't stand Starbuck's Coffee. Does this mean that there is hope for me ?

[2Evil4U]

Update:

I left the house this morning a minute or two early as I had to stop at the ATM at the Chase bank on 19 in Zachary. I ended up behind the slowest, non-computer literate nerd on earth. He finally finished and I got my money. After I stowed everything in the tank bag and rolled out of the ATM lane into the parking lot I heard it. BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP, BRa, BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAP. etc.

There he was again. In front of me and heading towards Baker.

I figured that this morning was as good a morning as any to hypermile the bike, so I started actually doing the speed limit. From the air, it probably looked like a Pepe LePew cartoon as I ended up catching him at the second light in Baker. I kept a car between us at all times because, and I shit you not, riding at least 100 yards behind that monstrosity, when he got on it even a little it would make my teeth hurt. He finally wobbled onto the on ramp and headed south down 110. I stayed back a ways to try to keep my fillings intact and figured I'd be able to cruise by in the Governor's Curves. But he finally exited at Chippewa and I carried on with my senses no longer molested by the audio-rape that is an un-muffled M109R.

(This is honestly the first time I've ever wanted to beat someone senseless for having loud pipes. I have never experienced a bike that has an engine note so painful until this one.)

Maybe I need to get a Stebel and show him what REAL loudness is.

[king4456]

Maybe I need to get a Stebel and show him what REAL loudness is.

installed mine this weekend.... so freakin loud

[thedrizel]

Ya know, for a cruiser the M109 is actually pretty "sporty"...loud pipes like that should really be harassed. It really does affect other people in life and that's no good.

[Klantz]

ya know Aaron... if I didn't know any better I would say you have found yourself a new riding buddy for the morning commute...

































:wall:

[2Evil4U]

They really are nice bikes. Very fast for their size, too. But they suck with drag pipes.

[thedrizel]

I've never found any bike sound good with drag pipes.

[Redbird]

You should have showed him what you were riding. I bet he'd have chuckled pretty good at that one!

What, a white guy on a 'busa? Banana12 Banana12 :D

[Britton]

Aaron, you're just jeaolous since your bike sounds like a sewing machine with a case of the winds.

[Rocky]

I thought that was just an old urban legend?
What, a white guy on a 'busa? Banana12 Banana12 :D

[Redbird]

I thought that was just an old suburb legend?

Fixed it for ya ;)

And yes, I am :D